Is June Over Yet?

Holy Moly it's been a busy week and now two!

I've been on 4 field trips in the last 3 weeks, and might I add, two of those were in 45C heat! It was a time, I tell ya!

This is the last week of the school year, and I couldn't be more thankful! I have a Book Club meeting tonight,  I still have to buy teacher gifts, and my eldest is turning 13 on Friday, topped off with a sleepover with 9 of her friends.

CALGON!

My husband was also travelling for much of the month, gone to Newfoundland and Montreal and then Toronto for a week.

I'm starting Month 2 of Insanity today which I hear is an HOUR long of crazy, sweat pouring off you mess. Month 1 started shaky but I ended up getting used to it and even though I was super hungry (like, mad fiend hungry) and more exhausted than usual (there may have been naps! Me! Naps!) I felt super powerful when it was done. I took a Recovery week last week and now am back hammering it out for the next four, coupled with running.

I did a 5k run with my husband yesterday (thankfully in fall like weather, which I LOVE) and somehow (I don't understand how this is possible!) did it in 34 minutes, with 4 of those minutes being walking. I ran 15, walked 2, ran 15, walked 2 home. It was actually 5.6km according to my mapping. That seems impossible to me. I got the Nike+ app so I'll try that out next run and see what it says in terms of pace and distance. If I can get to the point where I don't walk at all, and I can do the 5k in 30 minutes-I'll be a happy camper. I'd like to do it in under 30 but that might be stretching it!

Did I forget to mention? The reason for all of this frantic 5k stuff is because I signed up for my first ever 5k race! I'm doing the Army Marathon in September! This has been on my Bucket List forever and a day so I'm both psyched and terrified. Somehow, I'm also thinking I could do a 10k at some point. Who the heck am I?

That's my June scoop! Now, on to July and hopefully less stress, more fun, more sitting by the pool (my sisters that is!) and more training to be the best me by 40!

Father's Day

I'm looking at the above photo of my Dad, and I really still can't believe he's gone. It's surreal to me, probably because I also didn't get to physically be with him near or at the end, nor did I get to attend any final service for him so closure, as you will, didn't really happen.

Anyhoo. I digress.

It's Father's Day this Sunday, and my girls will have a fantastic day with their Dad. My youngest is making something at school for him, and we always let the "Person of the Day" sleep in, and then have breakfast in bed. From there, he'll choose how he wants to spend the remainder of the day and I'm sure it'll look something like swimming and BBQ'ing.

I tell my girls all of the time that they are extremely lucky and blessed to have the Daddy that they do. He's been hands on since Day 1. They go to him with everything and anything, sometimes to his male chagrin. They aren't shy around him, aren't embarrassed to ask him anything, and enjoy time just sitting with him holding his hand.  It makes my heart clench when I think of the relationship they have with him.

My Father/Daughter relationship was much more complicated. That being said, Father's Day was one of those days where I was sure I'd either see or talk to him. We didn't get together that regularly, so knowing I could count on that day was important to me.

My Dad wasn't a bad person, he didn't have ill intent and he wasn't mean.  He was just selfish, I guess, and too wrapped up in his own wants and needs. At the end of the day though, I knew he loved me. On Father's Day, I got that reassurance and his "Hi Sweetie."  How I miss hearing those simple words.

If you're lucky enough to have your Father still in your life this Father's Day, take the time to let him know what he means to you. I will be spending a moment doing the same.

Peace of my Heart

I know what you are thinking, " Not ANOTHER post about Halifax."  Well, you'll be pleased to know it sort of is, but not specifically. That's as clear as mud, huh?

I went to a Book Club meeting awhile back and we started talking about various places many of us have lived in our lives. One of the ladies was from the North, near where I lived previously. A few had lived in BC, where I also lived for a bit. Some of them were from the East Coast even, but now live here. Many of those that had lived "away" were from my home town.

What caught my interest from the conversation was that no matter where we originated, it didn't always translate to our hearts' home.

The women from the East Coast? They said they'd never live back there. They were surprised I loved it so much and said that coming from a "big city," I probably liked that it was a bit more relaxed, where they were so happy to have the many cultural events, shopping, shows and activities for their kids.  I, personally, didn't find that lacking on the East Coast but it's all a matter of perspective, right?

One lady was from Ontario but felt like Victoria was where she was meant to be. She said she just felt completely differently in her soul when there. She said she needed the mountains and the water and the weather to feel total contentment.

It's a funny thing isn't it? I guess it boils down to personal aesthetic and priorities and what your experience in  each place resembles.

I've lived in or visited most of this great country-even if just to pass through. I've lived in Kelowna, I've stayed in Victoria, I've driven across from there to Banff, to Winnipeg, to the North of Ontario. I've been to Quebec City and Montreal and surroundings. I've visited New Brunswick, swam at Parlee Beach, did Magnetic Hill a billion times, walked on the ocean floor. I've renewed vows and relaxed completely in PEI. I grew up in Ontario in a beautiful city with tons of green space and amenities and culture and safety.

I'm so happy to be surrounded by my friends here. It's been wonderful getting to be a part of their daily lives, their joys, supported in their sorrows. I wish I could pack them all up with me and take them everywhere my wanderlust heart wishes to travel.

My soul though? (here's the part you were dreading) It's still in Halifax. I can't accurately describe it-and much of those women mentioned above couldn't either. It's just an inner peace, a quietude. It was a sense of "THIS, this is where I'm supposed to be."

I was telling someone recently about my time there and how much it meant to be, how important it is to me to go back, and she answered, "You fell in love with the ocean, didn't you? You're an ocean girl with the wind in your hair. I can totally see it in your eyes."

I guess that's it, and I guess it's written all over my face.

I'm an ocean girl, with the wind in my hair.

Where do YOU feel most like yourself? Is there a place that you feel yourself completely relax and settle contentedly?

I Work OUUUUUTTTT

Bootycamp finished up it's course for April/May, and though it runs all summer, I, my friends, do not. I am just not a gal that does well in the heat. I can't even imagine doing the types of strenuous we did in 38C so...for the summer at least, I'm out! That left me wondering what the heck I would do with myself, fitness wise, during these sweltering next few months. I want to challenge myself again, start from crap and build up, and I'm also working towards a 5k that doesn't take me a bazillion years to run or even run/walk.

Obviously, I've lost my ever loving mind, because what I decided to do is clearly nuts.

I'm doing the Insanity workout AND running 3x a week. Did you hear me? Insanity AND running.

Let me preface this by saying,  after all my hardcore bootycamp working out, I truly thought Insanity wouldn't be THAT difficult. I used to find the Shred really hard, and now it's kinda ZZZZZZ. When I tell you bootycamp whipped my butt, I'm not even kidding!

I'm on Week 2, Day 2 of this Insanity/run craziness. Two days a week I do a 38 minute Insanity DVD and then hop on the treadmill and run 30 mins. I'm at the point now where I just run the whole 30, no walking. Well, I'm lying-that actually only happened once (on Sunday) but that's what I'm going for now! It's the new standard! I also do Insanity alone the 3-4 days of the week so that I'm working out 5-6 days in total.

The moves in the DVD are similar to many of the bootycamp exercises I did. The idea is using your own body weight to build muscle, so there are no weights or kettlebells or whatever. It's just me, my yoga mat and Shaun T. (well, and a bunch of other folks that already annoy the snot outta me!) The difference with Insanity is that there are hardly any breaks. It's like GO GO GO and then...die. The buff folks in the DVD take breaks, tap out, spit....which makes me feel better when I have to stop a second and then get going again. I'm literally DRIPPING all over my floor by the time I'm done. I know, sick!

I've also never been so tired in my life. By 3pm I'm begging for a nap. Those who know me well know that, I'm  "anti-sleep."  I'd pretty much rather do ANYTHING than sleep. It's just such a waste of time! Well, not so much anymore. I've been in bed by 10pm and turning the lights out around 11-12pm. I know that's not "early" to those of you who go to bed at like 9pm, but for me-that's monumental.

I'm also starving like crazy. I work out, have a recovery drink, and then pretty much cannot wait more than a moment before shoving food into my face.

I've got some organized workouts lined up with an instructor too, but I couldn't fit them in this week. I'm hoping to do those occasionally over the summer. (Wednesday nights and Saturday morning-early!)

We'll see if I can stick this out for the next two months-minus vacay time. I'm playing around with the Insanity schedule, making it work for me in terms of number of days and switching up the days of the week I'm supposed to do whatever DVD is called for that day. As long as I get each of them into the week, then I'm good.

When the trainer warns you in the warm up that he's "worried about this workout" and then collapses on the floor at the end of it and says, "this s@*t is bananas!" you know you've survived something hardcore!

                                                  (image from dvdstreets.com)

Let Me Entertain You....Or Not

                                                         (image from kitestring.ca)

Do you like to entertain and have your friends over on a regular basis? Is your home known as "party headquarters?"  Are your friends so comfortable in your home that they know where you keep that special "doohickey thing" in that particular kitchen drawer?

I love to socialize. In fact, I'm someone who could be "out and about" most nights of the week, as long as I'm home a day or two. I'm happiest when I'm surrounded by friends and hate to miss out on any social function if I can help it.

That said, I'm a hot mess when it comes to entertaining myself.

I envy my friends who just "throw something together" and in the moment are cool as cucumbers. They don't stress it, everything flows seamlessly and the whole evening is just relaxing for all in attendance.

Me? Not so much.

Let me preface this by saying, I'm a perfectionist. I'm also very self-critical, and a worrier. BINGO! Not usually a recipe for a laid-back, casual affair!

For me to entertain my friends, even if it's just hanging out, is a major production. MA-JOR! My house needs to be spotless, so I spend days getting it just so. The food needs to be delicious and turn out perfectly. I can usually spend most of the time in the kitchen, sweating and frantic, so that everything is "right."  I worry about every minute detail and generally give myself heart palpitations. All in all, once everyone is gone, I pop some Tums and try to decompress.

Can you guess why I'd rather go out, go elsewhere, do anything?

My husband always makes fun of me when we have friends in for just these reasons. He'll joke that I can't serve "one" snack, I have to have ten. He'll tease me about scurrying about and admonish me to "just sit down!"  He always reiterates that my friends wouldn't care-they just wanna hang.

This is all true enough.

The fact of the matter is, when I go to my friends' houses, I don't notice the cleanliness. I don't care that everything is perfect, I don't even really care what we eat. I just want to see my friends and chillax. But for myself, it's a whole different ballgame.  Hosting, therefore, isn't enjoyable for me. It's not a "fun" evening. It's one that makes me superdedooper anxious.

I guess everyone has their thing, right? Their own special neurosis?  Whether they worry about their health or  are anxious about spiders...whatever the case may be....mine is having to be Martha Stewart apparently.

So, if you don't know my house inside and out or if you wonder why I'd always prefer to come to you, it's not because I'm a cheapskate or lazy. It's the complete opposite. I'd go so overboard and be such a rattled mess, trust me, no one would WANT to come here. When I say your place would be a better idea, it really, really would be!

I'm going to try working on this though, because as I said, I love having people around. Like everything in my life, it's going to be baby steps.

Excuse me, do you have any Grey Poupon?