Even though my "Love Language" might be "Words," I'm the type of girl that isn't impressed by empty ones.
My friend Tania and I were discussing this the other day, and while I DO think expressing yourself emotionally takes courage, most times, it's just not enough. I'm a talker, for sure. I value communication in all it's various forms, and I actually really admire those that can express their emotions with eloquence. I can chat and discuss and argue, but break down and tell you how I'm feeling? I'm not great at that. I always feel weak when it happens, so I try to minimize it's occurrence.
However much I like to hear appreciative comments or constructive commentary, I'm the opposite when it comes to empty promises and feigned apology. Don't give me your lip service as it's just going to fall on deaf ears.
Tania and I were contemplating how many times we've heard people talk, talk, talk about their plans or promises. You know what? Blah, blah, blah. If you aren't going to back it up with ACTION, don't even bother saying it. You're just wasting your time and mine.
Maybe that goes hand in hand with my not being a "romantic." I'm that girl that doesn't want syrupy words of flattery. It's all embarrassing and juvenile to me. Even as a teen or young woman, if a guy said the old, "You're SO hot!" I threw up in my mouth a little bit. Really? That's the best you got?
What I DO want? Behaviours that back up your words. If you're apologetic, let your actions show it by trying to actually make amends. If you're over the moon in love, how does that look? By the same token, if you're angry? Don't walk away tight lipped and not say anything for 3 days. I don't want to be yelled at or anything, I'm not a glutton for punishment. Geeze though, not only am I not a mind reader, I also am not the type that's going to follow you around, patting your hand and asking if you're okay until you crack. Nope. I'm more likely to let you stew and ignore it.
Some might say that I come across as a stone cold b*(#$ around this issue. I'm okay with that. I'd rather be someone who not only says what I mean, but can stand by it and say that I backed it up too.
The old saying still holds true.
Actions speak louder than words.
I love this post! I couldn't agree more. I am the type of person who wears my heart on my sleeve & usually have to get things off my chest - can't stand harbouring bad feelings. I also never say things I don't mean. I can't stand it when people say things they don't mean or give you empty handed gestures like offer to do things just to say it to "sound" nice. I never chase after people if they say they are "fine," and really aren't. I find it immature. Just effing say what's on your mind and get it off your chest! I am a genuine person and expect the same in return :-)
ReplyDeleteAMEN!! talk is cheap - show me you mean what you say. anyone can write a long letter or give a sappy card or just pay lip-service. put your money where your mouth is. and if it makes me a cold hearted b*+<h because I feel this way, then so be it. you tell 'em girl!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the HELL YEAH'S ladies! LOL
ReplyDeleteI don't wear my heart on my sleeve-I'm pretty much the opposite-but I definitely try to keep it real. I try to say what I mean and mean what I say. I DO definitely believe in getting things off my chest. LOL Many people aren't so thrilled with that fact. LOL Most of the time-I'm down to earth and pretty easy going though-so it doesn't come up often that I have to be "mean," but I get so ticked off at other people. I guess "disappointed" more than ticked off. I'm definitely genuine-and appreciate that quality SO MUCH in others. I've had enough heartache from people who weren't to last me a million lifetimes. I have to surround myself with goodness and kindness. :)