Cue The Theme Music....

The numerical value of this new year is "13" which many see as unlucky, but just as many view as supremely prosperous. I'm becoming quite the optimist, often full of hope, so I'm going to go with the latter, myself.

I read the other day, both on Twitter and through friends on Facebook, about this "one word" idea to set as the tone for your year. In 2012, without ever knowing about that concept, I did just that. (Dang it! If I publicized these thoughts I have before someone else, I'd be a millionaire by now!) I chose the word "LEAPING" for the duration, with my motto being "feel the fear, and do it any ways."  I knew I had lots of interests I wanted to pursue, things I'd dreamt about doing, but was often too nervous or afraid to do so. I wanted that to change. I decided to make it my goal to honour the emotions or anxieties I felt, to allow myself to feel them, but then to let them go and to plunge, shaky knees and butterfly tummy and all.

I'm proud of everything I did in 2012 and the way I was able to make important choices to get me there-whether it be in surrounding myself with incredible individuals to push me forward when I couldn't push myself, or by simply believing in my own ability.

As I reflected on the year ahead, I went through a few words and one kept coming back to me. It just felt "right."  That word is SEEK. It worked with other key concepts: seek and find, seek change, seek growth.  I've focused a lot on the physical, which obviously took much of the emotional and mental to accomplish, but I haven't explored all of the areas of that which will make me feel more whole. I let the "SEEK" ruminate in my heart and mind for a bit, when a thought came to me. Seeking is exactly what I need to do, to be sure, but I need to do MORE than just seek. I don't want to just "look" for the answers I need, I want to act on them as well. In this way, "SEEK" didn't seem as much of an action word as I'd hoped would reflect what I'd like to achieve.

I went to some of my very smart pals and asked for their help, exposing my thoughts and feelings, and hoping for some clarification, ideas or guidance. Of course I found all of that in spades, cause you know, I hang with the best of the best!

After discussing a few words and options, as well as delving into what I'd like this year to mean to me, it came to me. Heck, even the themed catch-phrase popped into my head. As I looked up the dictionary meaning, it became even more serendipitous that I had chosen the most significant word for me, because my word is also a synonym for "SEEK."

From merriam-webster.com:

¹ven·ture

Definition of VENTURE

transitive verb

1

: to expose to hazard : risk, gamble <ventured a buck or two on the race>

2

: to undertake the risks and dangers of : brave <ventured the stormy sea>

3

: to offer at the risk of rebuff, rejection, or censure <venture an opinion>

intransitive verb

: to proceed especially in the face of danger 

My word for 2013 is "VENTURE."

 "Nothing ventured, nothing gained."  I also see venture in "adventure," which I hope to have many of as well. 

I loved the definitions because another word that had appeared in my thoughts was "brave" and to venture is to brave, at the risk of danger or rejection. It works with my continuing theme from last year, building and expanding on the idea of leaping, but it almost, in my opinion, pushes it even further in the risking. I need to do that in several areas this year.

I was getting very frustrated, in tears at one point, as I explored my goals for the year, because honestly, I can't yet put my finger on exactly what they are in some regards. They remain a little ambiguous, and will require quite a bit of deep soul searching, that I'm venturing for my OWN betterment, and not from outside pressures or a sense of guilty responsibility.  The idea isn't to resent what I undertake, but to flourish and embrace the change. It's supposed to be a total, personal, transformative undertaking, and that seems huge, but I feel like I'm standing on a pivotal precipice and that I'm *so* close to discovering my best self and living it. That can only be good, right? It scares and frustrates me because I have NO idea what some of this even looks like yet, and it may not be a "one year" endeavour, but I'm embarking on this journey again for as long as it takes.

I'm venturing and risking to get to a feeling of peace and contentment in all facets of my life, the physical being only one of those. I hope you'll all support, encourage and follow along as I document, struggle and challenge.

Venturing into 2013.